Forum Decorum

Forum Decorum
(Borrowed and adapted from the Metropolitan Opera Stagebill, by Byron Belt)

The Scholars Forum Series is getting into full swing. The guest speaker has just made a moving or profound statement, then... zip zip zip rustle rustle rustle CRASH! Some unthinking Scholar, burrowing through a bookbag, drops a calculator, or spills a Coke, or has a cellophane bag of Cheetos explode in his/her lap. PLEASE: When you are in Forum be conscious of the fact that excessive movement, unzipping and moving of bookbags, whispering to neighbors, etc., ...all of these are distracting and VERBOTEN! Simple common sense and courtesy will vastly improve the serenity and happiness of all who are attending the Scholars Forum Series.

Here are some helpful commandments that should guide your participation in Forum.

Thou Shalt Not:

Talk... unless you are engaging in the conversation with our guest
speaker/performer. This is the first and greatest commandment. In a large audience of students, it only takes a few whispered remarks to a few neighbors to make it seem like a steam pipe has burst.
Rustle Thy Program. Restless readers and page skimmers aren't good listeners and greatly distract those around them.
Crack Thy Gum In Thy Neighbors' Ears. The noise is totally inexcusable and usually unconscious.
Jangle Thy Jewelry. Owners are usually immune and unaware, but the added percussion is disturbing to others.
Open Cellophane-Wrapped Munchies. Next to talking, this is the most generally serious offense to Forum peace. If you have a bad throat and have to have a cough drop or lozenge, please open it quickly! Trying to be quiet by opening the wrappers slowly only prolongs the torture for everyone around you.
Zip Open and Close Thy Bookbag or Purse. The best bet is to leave these things in your rooms when you come to Forum. If you have to have your bag with you, leave it partially unzipped from the beginning; then if you feel you have to get something out or put something in your bag, do it as quietly as possible.
Sigh With Boredom and Roll Your Eyes. If you are in agony - keep it to yourself. Your neighbor just may be in ecstasy - which also should be kept under quiet control.
Arrive Late or Leave Early. It is unfair to our guest performers, lecturers and other Scholars to come in late or to leave early. Forums have scheduled times. Abide by them. A student will not be excused from Forums to "have an appointment with my instructor."
Sleep. If you are too tired to pay attention in Forum, don't attend. Take an absence (you're allowed two for the semester) or attend an alternate event on that week's schedule.

Again, these are guidelines that are really simply rules of common courtesy. For the sake of all Scholars, please try to keep them in mind each week!